Can't Do This
by Sweet-Porcelain16
Summary: Neff. Nick and Jeff are best friends. That's all there is to it… right? Just a little fluffy oneshot I wrote at midnight last night :


**A/N I'm wrote this at midnight. Forgive me. :) **

Nick grinned.

"Jeff, that is genius. Pure genius."

"I know," Jeff replied simply, high-fiving his best friend. The two boys were sitting on the floor of their shared room at Dalton; surrounded by little drawings, maps and diagrams. Pens, highlighters and bits of rubber littered the floor, and the bin in the corner was overflowing with crumpled up pieces of paper.

"Nick, I believe that this will be the greatest April Fools day prank ever."

"Of course it is. I designed it!"

"With help from your handsome assistant."

"I don't see any handsome assistants…" Jeff swatted Nick over the head, laughing.

"I'm more handsome than you!" Jeff smirked.

"No way. I am the supermegafoxyawesomehottest person here." Nick replied, sticking his tongue out at the blonde boy.

"I am!"

"No, I am!"

"I've had an idea…" Jeff said, jumping up and tugging Nick out of the door.

"Kurt? Blaine?" he called, running down the hallway. Catching onto the idea immediately, Nick joined in, and they both pounded on the room belonging to Kurt Hummel and Blaine Anderson. Kurt opened the door a few seconds later, his hair ruffled and shirt buttons done up wrong.

"We interrupting?" Nick smirked, eying Kurt's messy appearance.

"No, not at all…" Kurt replied, his voice dripping with sarcasm. They heard Blaine sigh from inside the room.

"Let 'em in…"

"I'm surprised that they let you two share a room, with you two being together and all…" Kurt commented, leading the boys into the room. Blaine was sat cross legged on one of the beds, his hair just as messy as Kurt's. They both looked thoroughly made-out with.

"They let you two share a room, and so are you," Kurt replied. Jeff caught Nick's eye and they both raised an eyebrow symmetrically.

"Uh, Kurt? We're not together…" Nick said, turning red.

"Just friends…"

"Best friends," Jeff corrected him. Kurt murmured an embarrassed apology.

"Sorry… You're just… joined at the hip, and both gay…" He murmered.

Jeff smiled.

"We're not gay, either. I generally fancy girls." he winked.

"Generally?" Nick questioned, and then it was Jeff's turn to go red.

"I've had a crush… on one boy before…"

"Oh. Cool. Why didn't you tell me?"

"Didn't feel the need to," Jeff mumbled. Shock flitted through Kurt's features. Jeff had just admitted to fancying a boy and Nick didn't care? Blaine coughed awkwardly.

"Anyway, what did you come for? We're… quite busy…"

"We want to know who's the most supermegafoxyawesomehot!" the boys said together. Kurt and Blaine sighed.

"Nick," Kurt said.

"Jeff," Blaine said.

Both boys facepalmed.

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"You cannot be serious?" Nick whispered, annoyance clear in his voice.

"What?" Jeff asked quietly from the other side of the room.

"They've locked us in!" a devastated Nick cried, forgetting to be quiet in his frustration. Giggles erupted from the other side of the door, and both boys pressed their ears against it to listen.

"Now they can't prank us while we sleep." Kurt's satisfied voice said.

"Good. Last year they tied all opposite doorknobs together- you couldn't open any of them! We were stuck for three hours until Mr. Harvey decided to see why none of the Warblers seemed to be in their classes." Blaine replied.

Suddenly, a door opened and banged shut, and footsteps thudded down the hallway.

"What the hell," Wes asked angrily, "Are you doing talking so loudly in the middle of the corridor? It's gone curfew!"

"We were locking Neff up 'till morning." Blaine replied. Nick caught Jeff's eye and grinned at their name. The two best friends were inseparable, and 'Nick and Jeff' was a bit of a mouthful to say. So they were Neff. Just like Kurt and Blaine were Klaine. And Wes and his gavel were Wavel.

"Oh. Well that's fine then. Just… don't wake anyone else up. Go to bed."

Both boys' jaws dropped. Wes had caught Klaine up after curfew and they weren't even in trouble? Matching sounds of outrage left their mouths at the unfairness. All they'd wanted to do was cover everyone with sillystring! And cover Wes' floor with plastic cups of water, so when he stepped out of bed his carpet, feet and anything else on the floor would get soaked…

They were completely innocent. Well, almost.

"Looks like we have to stay in here for the night," Nick grumbled.

"Huh. I blame Klaine. They're out to get us!"

"Let's watch A Very Potter Musical."

"Oh. Okay."

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"Warblers' April Fools Day PARTYYY! Come to the CHOIR ROOOOM! Warblers ONLYYYY!" Jeff shouted into the little plastic thing that would make the message heard all over the school. He had no idea what it was called. Nick came sprinting into the room, looking exhausted.

"It worked. It was heard on the speakers all over the school. But we need to get out of here!"

"Why?" the blonde asked as Nick pulled him out of the room and towards their room, "we were given permission for the party…"

"But NOT for it to be announced over the speakers. If we run into any teachers, we're screwed!" the boys ran into their room, panting. They'd just collapsed onto their respective beds when an angry knock came at the door.

"Who is it?"

"It's Wes. Let me in." reluctantly, Nick pulled open the door for Wes.

"You two are idiots." he said bluntly, settling himself into the armchair. "Now we're gonna have a whole load of randomers trying to get in."

"Oh." both boys said together. And suddenly, both faces lit up, and they grinned.

"We'll have secret names-" Nick said.

"And Passwords!" Jeff added.

"And we'll give them out personally to every warbler!" they said together, and Wes smiled.

"Get to it, then!"

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"Names?"

"It's Kurt and Blaine!"

"Secret Names?" Jeff repeated for what felt like the hundredth time that evening.

"Oh… um… what are those again? Er… WHY IS MY SECRET NAME NICK?" Kurt shouted. "And why is mine Jeff?" Blaine added.

"Because you love us." Nick replied simply. Blaine sighed, but they were let in.

Finally, all the Warblers were there. It turned out that every Warbler's secret name was either Nick or Jeff. Because, as Jeff put it, they were cool like that.

A game of 'Never have I Ever' was in full flow.

"Never have I ever… kissed anyone I wasn't dating," Wes announced, and passed the bottle to Jeff, who grinned and passed it to Nick. Nick passed it to Trent who passed it to Blaine who took a sip.

"Who?" the circle chorused, looking at Blaine questioningly.

"Rachel Berry. In New Directions." he said simply. Kurt looked nervous as he was passed the bottle from Blaine. To everyone's surprise, he took a sip.

"WHO?" the Warblers asked in unison. Blaine's hand tightened on Kurt's as the taller boy took a deep breath.

"The boy who bullied me out of the school. He kissed me."

The bottle went around the circle until it was at David, who announced,

"Never have I ever lied about something important."

"That's quite enough of this game!" Nick quickly shouted, startling the Warblers. Most of them were too drunk to notice Nick's abrupt ending to the game, but Jeff did.

"You'll tell me later?" he murmured. Nick seemed to think about it for a second, before nodding his head once.

"Strip Truth or Dare!" Thad announced, grinning.

"Wes!"

"Dare."

"Kiss David!" Wes sighed But obliged to Kurt's orders, pecking his best friend before shuddering.

"Kurt!" Jeff called.

"Truth."

"Who is the hottest? Wes or David?"

"Wes." Wes giggled, and David glared at Kurt.

"Jeff." David said,

"Truth. Easy."

"Have you ever had a crush on someone you're not suppost to have?"

"Yeah."

Several more questions were asked, and dares done, and the over all result was a topless Blaine, Kurt and Wes, and, surprisingly, an almost completely naked Nick. Jeff couldn't help his eyes wandering to his best friend, who didn't seem self conscious at all.

"Jeff."

"Truth."

"Who was this person you had a crush on?" Jeff groaned and removed his T-shirt. Blaine wolf-whistled drunkenly, and Jeff felt Nick's eyes on him. He shifted uncomftorbly.

"Nick?"

"Dare."

"Kiss Jeff." both boys' eyes widened. Nick would have to kiss him… or he'd lose his boxers. Jeff bit his lip. This would be awkward… but, to his surprise, Nick kissed him quickly on the cheek and smirked at Trent, who'd given the dare.

"Didn't specify where to kiss Jeff!" Jeff's stomach lurched in what he was sure was relief… it definitely wasn't disappointment. No. It wasn't. Not disappointment. Not at all. A few more questions were asked, and then-

"Jeff!"

"Truth…" he said slowly. He knew if he asked for dare, he'd end up kissing someone…

"Is the person you have a crush on… in this room?" Jeff sighed. He really didn't want to lose his trousers. Taking a deep breath, he said,

"Yes." The room erupted in talking at once.

"Oh my God, really?"

"Who is it?"

"I didn't know you were gay!"

Jeff stared at the floor, face flushed.

"Yes, really. No, I'm not saying who it is, and no I'm not gay. Just… just this one guy."

Luckily for Jeff, the teachers decided that the party was over for the night. They sent the Warblers up to their rooms, claiming that the party had gone on long enough. Reluctantly, the boys headed up the stairs, still questioning Jeff. Half way to his room, Nick joined his friend. To the blonde's relief, his best friend was fully clothed again, wearing a t-shirt and jeans. They walked in awkward silence for a while, both sets of eyes cast downwards. It was a sign of their friendship that neither of them questioned the other one until they were in their room, the door closed. Jeff spoke first.

"You first. I don't think I can… not yet." Nick sighed, but nodded.

"You- you want to know why I changed the game when that question came up."

"Yes." Jeff replied, locking gazes with Nick, looking at him steadily. Nick groaned.

"Because I have lied about something big. And they'd have asked what… Jeff?" Nick asked, his breath quickening.

"What are we? Are we just friends? Or are we- are we something more?" his face was so close, eyes still staring intently at the other's. Nick dropped his gaze to Jeff's lips, and Jeff knew what was happening.

"It depends if you want to be more." Jeff murmured, leaning in slowly and touching Nick's lips with his own. It was barely a kiss, but it sent electric shivers down Jeff's back, and _why was Nick pulling away? _Eyes fluttered open, and Nick smiled nervously, sending a jolt through Jeff's stomach

"I think I do." and Nick's lips were on his again, and fire coursed through his veins, his hands in Nick's hair… Nick's hands moved up and down Jeff's back, making the blonde boy shiver, and pull his best friend closer. He didn't know how they managed to get in the position they were in without breaking the fierce kiss, but somehow, Jeff was lying on the floor, his back arched into Nick, who was on top of him. A tiny corner of Jeff's mind was screaming at him, telling him that it was too heated, too fast. but The rest of his head was going _Ohmigod, you're kissing Nick, ohmigod, ohmigod. _

"Guys, we- WHAT THE HELL?" The boys sprung apart at the sound of Wes' voice in the doorway. The door closed, and Wes ran down the hall shouting,

"Nick and Jeff are making out! Neff has finally happened! Took even longer than Klaine! Nick and Jeff are making out!"

"Well, this is awkward!" Jeff smiled at his best friend's 'state-the-obvious' moment.

"Let's fix that." he smirked, and crashed his lips against Nick's once more.

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**A/N: I just needed some fluff. :) **

**So I wrote this on my IPod at mignight last night. It's not up to my usual standard, sorry. I was tired. And wanted some Neff fluff. Review! Please? xx**


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